TNA Impact Spoilers.

Hour one notes:

Jeremy Borash was sent by Jim Cornette to find World champion Kurt Angle. But he found Angle in a tanning bed and he refused to go see Cornette. Angle also accused Borash of “checking out his package.” Angle felt Samoa Joe was going to surrender the tag titles after was screwed over on Sunday.

(1) XXX (“PrimeTime” Elix Skipper, “Fallen Angel” Christopher Daniels & Senshi) defeated Serotonin (Raven, Havok & Martyr)

That’s right the multi-time former World Tag Team champions reunited last Sunday when Daniels became #1 contender to the World X Division title. XXX wasted no time in their trickery as Skipper went to lockup with Havok and Daniels jumped him from behind. The XXX advantage ended when raven hit Daniels in the back with the Singapore cane. That allowed Serotonin to take over Daniels in their corner of the ring. Martyr had Daniels in a front facelock when Skipper hit a slingshot move that let Daniels free so he could tag in Senshi. The end came for Havok who got hit with a Skipper legdrop, Daniels’ BME and Senshi’s Warrior’s Way.

After the match Frankie “the Future” Kazarian attacked Serotonin and left before he could suffer any real damage. Jeremy Borash came back to Angle’s tanning bed to find Angle tanning his buttocks. He told Angle that Cornette would fine him $10,000 if he didn’t come to the office. Angle got out of the tanning bed to find all of his clothes and two title belts missing. So he left the room in his bikini briefs. Mike Tenay & Don West were addressing the home audience when Team 3D crashed the party. They said they knew the Steiner Brothers were not in the building but were watching at home. Ray said they cost Team 3D their World Tag Team titles and wanted to repay them face to face next week. Devon didn’t like something Tenay said and he choked him as Ray grabbed the timekeeper’s hammer threatening to hit Tenay. Kurt Angle began his search for his clothing and he questioned the TNA locker room. He accused Shark Boy of smiling like it was a joke, so he attacked him. Maybe Angle wasn’t wearing his glasses broke by Serotonin last Sunday or he just didn’t realize Shark wears a mask.

(2) Voodoo Kin Mafia member Kip James (w/BG James & Roxxi Laveaux) defeated Lance Hoyt (w/Christy Hemme).

Both Kip and Hoyt fought a power match in the early moments until Kip sent Hoyt to the floor where he followed and laid in some punches. Hoyt tried to avoid the punches and Laveaux as best he could and the tide turned when Kip focused on Hemme instead of Hoyt. Hoyt attacked and took the match back to the ring. Kip fought back with a Thesz press and avoided a Hoyt boot to hit “the One and Only” to win. After the match Hemme tried to crotch shot Kip but got stopped and Laveaux came in to hit a Styles Clash-like move sending Hemme to the locker room in Hoyt’s arms.

Kurt Angle met with the TNA production crew trying to find his lost items. He told everyone he would count to ten and they could return his stuff. Poor David Sahadi had to endure Angle’s package being near his face as the countdown occurred. A cameraman decided to leave but Angle attacked him thinking he was the thief.

(3) “Instant Classic” Christian Cage & “Tennessee Cowboy” James Storm (w/Jacqueline Moore, a six pack of longnecks & Tomko) defeated “War Machine” Rhino & “Wildcat” Chris Harris.

These four men met in singles matches on Sunday night so Jim Cornette decided to let them settle their differences. Harris jumped Cage at the opening bell and went to work with the punches before tagging in Rhino. However Rhino took his focus off Cage for too long and looking for Storm cost him. Cage hit Rhino with a clothesline off the ring apron. Cage & Storm kept Rhino isolated from his corner for several minutes. Harris tried to aid Rhino but it only did harm as Cage kept the referee busy, Storm hit a running boot to the face. Somehow Cage ended up on Storm’s shoulders as Rhino was on the top buckle and Rhino raked Storm’s eyes. Rhino hit Cage with a clothesline and tagged into a fired up Harris. Rhino had Storm set for the GORE but Cage pulled him to the floor. Storm went for the Superkick but Harris blocked it and hit the Catatonic but Tomko pulled referee Rudy Charles to the floor. Harris looked for the referee and Dustin Rhodes hit him in the back with a chair. Storm crawled over and covered Harris to win. After the match the real fun began as Rhino attacked anyone that moved including Moore but Rhino picked her up for a powerslam. He made the mistake of losing sight of Tomko, who kicked Rhino in the face making Moore fall onto Rhino. When you thought things were done Abyss came looking for revenge on Cage. Cage hightailed it but backed into Sting and the baseball bat. Sting tossed Cage into Abyss for some retribution.

A nicely robed Kurt Angle came into the Impact Zone. Angle said he had a sense of humor and enjoyed being ribbed but the joking was over. He even accused the fans of stealing his stuff and putting it on E-Bay. That brought out Samoa Joe who came with his three title belts and Angle’s wardrobe plus the World title belt. Joe decided to make his announcement. He wanted to bury the hatchet with Angle so he gave Angle back his two title belts and clothing. Joe said like Angle he wants to find out who is the best in the world. Joe said at Hard Justice he wanted Angle one more time where the winner takes all the gold. Angle accepted and Joe headbutted him right in the forehead. Joe laid out Angle and then went for a table. But Angle escaped Joe’s clutches and drove Joe into the table, locking the Ankle Lock on Joe. Afterwards Jeremy Borash filmed some stuff for TNA Today.

Hour two notes:

(1) NO DQ match, Sting defeated Robert Roode (w/Ms. Brooks).

Not too sure what happened between these two to make it a no DQ match. Roode jumped Sting at the bell and the violence began. Sting fought back introducing Roode’s head to the top turnbuckles and followed him to the floor. Ting tossed Roode into the guardrails and the stairs as Brooks objected. Roode fought back but his piledriver but Sting backdropped Roode on the rampway. Brooks kept Sting busy as Roode got a chair and hit Sting in the back. Roode came back into the ring with a top rope clothesline for two as Eric Young came out painted like Sting. Roode ignored Young and hit Sting with a top rope knee for two before locking in a bear hug. Sting tried to escape so Roode backed him to a corner but his chest chops had zero effect. Sting was 100% fired up and took it out on Roode & Brooks. Roode avoided the Stinger Splash and fought off the Scorpion Deathlock, hitting Sting with a spinebuster for two. Brooks gave Roode a chair but Young took it and Sting won via the Scorpion Death Drop.

(2) Latin American Xchange (“Notorious 187” Homicide & Hotstuff Hernandez) defeated Motor City Machine Guns (Alex Shelley & “the Future” Chris Sabin).

At the bell the Gun dropkicked Hernandez to the floor so they could double team Homicide for several minutes. The Notorious One fought back and tagged in Hernandez who tossed around the Guns. But the Guns fought back with a series of kicks to the head of Hernandez. LAX double teamed Shelley and sent him to the floor with a hurt back. Sabin escaped the Cop Killer but couldn’t avoid a LAX double team from the top rope.

The LAX celebration was interrupted by Team 3D who told them to hit the bricks; they only wanted the Steiner Brothers in the ring. LAX reluctantly stepped out of the ring as the show went to commercial. 3D egged on the fans waiting for the Steiner’s. The fans made fun of 3D member Devon who owns a smoothie shop in Florida. 3D got their wish and the Steiner Brothers hit the ring. Scott said no one calls out the Steiner’s they do the calling out. Scott said the Latin Nation were his favorite people after his injury during a TNA Event in Puerto Rico. Scott said he was upset he missed Slammiversary due to a trachea injury that nearly killed him. To the shock of everyone in the thank you to the PR medical team that saved him, Scott also thanked the fans for the well wishes he received. Ray said that Scott got injured by a second rate PR wrestler and Team 3D could take him out, even going as far as doubting the actuality of any injury. Scott showed off his scar on the right side of his chest. Ray said that injury was nothing compared to the ones in the ECW locker room. The arguing was not over as the Voodoo Kin Mafia came out to join the former World Tag Team reunion saying they were the best team in wrestling history. Scott said yeah the VKM was on top, on top of a heap of crap a everyone was watching WCW for 84 weeks in a row. Scott said he wasn’t medically cleared for a match but he could kick their asses with no permission needed. During the fighting Devon spit on a LAX flag and that brought out LAX to defend their flags and it looked liked the Steiner’s.

(3) No DQ match, “the Phenomenal” AJ Styles defeated Abyss.

This rivalry goes back to the weekly PPV days in Nashville where they tore down the Asylum even as they held the NWA World Tag Team championships. This was probably the bloodiest match in their rivalry. Styles hit a slingshot shoulder tackle and we were off and brawling. Abyss fought back with a running butt to the face in the corner. Abyss went to press slam Styles too the fans but Styles slid off only to be see Styles go over the ropes to the floor. Styles hit Abyss in the head wit ha chair and climbed into the fans, hitting a sort of springboard forearm from the seats. Abyss went back to the ring as Abyss tossed a chair in for some fun as he put the chair in between the buckles. Styles countered out of Shock Treatment but even after moves couldn’t avoid the chair in the corner. Abyss hit Shock Treatment for two and signaled for Doomsday. But Styles countered out of the Black Hole Slam and hit the Pele’. Styles went for a springboard move but Abyss caught him and hit the chokeslam for two as Tomko came out to ringside. Abyss hit the Black Hole Slam but Tomko broke up the pin. But the lights went down and up with Sting in the ring attacking Tomko. Abyss went under the ring and when he went for the bag of goodies he was dragged under ring. This left Sting alone to be attacked by Styles, Tomko and Robert Roode who joined the festivities. Abyss finally came out from under the ring a bloody mess. Christian Cage and his black shirt security appeared on the rampway and Cage grabbed the bag of broken glass, spreading it in the ring. But instead of Abyss, Tomko chokeslammed Sting into the glass. Styles got another bag from under the ring and it was thumb tacks spread on top of the glass. Tomko hit Abyss with the double chokeslam and Styles won via pinfall. Jeremy Borash came out to film more TNA Today stuff talking to Styles, Cage, Tomko and Roode. The TNA medical trainer had to come out and check on Sting & Abyss before he would let them go to the locker room for treatment.

Matches filmed for TNA Xplosion and TNA Today on the internet:

(1) Jerry Lynn defeated Basham via countout.

(2) Motor City Machine Guns (Alex Shelley & “the Future” Chris Sabin) defeated “the Guru” Sonjay Dutt & Petey Williams when Sabin countered out of the Canadian Destroyer, allowing Shelley to hit a top rope boot to Williams’ head setting up the Cradle Shock.

(3) “Black Machismo” Jay Lethal & “Showtime” Eric Young defeated Serotonin members Havok & Martyr when Young hit both men with a DVD and Lethal hit his Macho Man elbow drop.

Guesses and Official Matches for Hard Justice 2007:

(official) In a “winner takes all” match, TNA World/IWGP Heavyweight champion vs. World X Division/World Tag Team champion Samoa Joe

(Guess) Team 3D (Ray & Devon) vs Rick & Scott Steiner vs. Voodoo Kin Mafia (Kip & BG James w/Roxxie Laveaux) vs. Latin American Xchange (“Notorious 187” Homicide & Hotstuff Hernandez) or an 8 man match of some kind

(Guess) “Wildcat” Chris Harris vs. Dustin Rhodes

(Guess) Abyss vs. “Instant Classic” Christian Cage

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